Today's news is dedicated to Les Moonves's loose lips.

Girls! Girls! Girls!

Hell hath no fury like an angry former child actor who hates his own show.

Look what ol' Sandy dragged in.

Looks like we'll get to see how revenge is served for a little longer.

Thanks, God! I was hoping you'd been listening to my prayers about Stephen Colbert making a one-hour musical Christmas special featuring the likes of Elvis Costello, Feist, Jon Legend, Willie Nelson and token Jew Jon Stewart! And I'm not even that mad that you insisted on putting that assmongrel Toby Keith on the bill, because I know I'm not the only one in the universe (or at least that's the game we're pretending today). From what I can tell, this little revue you've whipped up, which you wisely decided to call A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All, sounds almost identical to A Muppet Family Christmas: Colbert gets snowed in at his cabin upstate and weathers the storm (lit'rally) by singing songs with all his buddies. (Ohhh, and Toby Keith even looks like Miss Piggy! This analogy totally works!)