The second season finale of the trainwreck known as Bachelor Pad aired last night and the episode itself was kind of forgettable... the only worthwhile thing that happened was that Michael and Holly decided to take Michelle and Graham to the finale with them instead of Vienna and Kasey. (Yes, Vienna was crushed because her perfect rose record was demolished.) The rest of the time was spent with the pairs flying around in some Cirque Du Soleil harnesses to impress former Bachelor alums Trista, Jason and Ali (carried onto the stage by Roberto). But the reunion? That was where the fun actually started. Here are the highlights:
We understand that Bachelor Pad is a melting pot of venereal diseases, but normally a lot of the sexual encounters are left to the imagination... or at least happen when the cameras aren't around. We're not prudes or anything, but we watch this show to see what kind of hook-ups happen, not to be horrified at how they unfold. We might be scarred for life after last night's episode... not that it will stop us from tuning in for next week's finale or anything, though.
On last night's episode, we finally got resolution on the nail-biting cliffhanger from the week prior. Big shocker: Jake went home instead of Kasey. The former Bachelor graciously (and delusionally) stepped up and gave a speech about forgiveness and how he was really glad to have met Vienna's new boyfriend and that he felt good about the whole experience. Did we mention he was a bit delusional? Or possibly under the influence of some happy pills? But after his exit, things took a turn for the worse and we spent most of the episode trying to crawl out of our own skin. And that's not even counting the unveiling of this fall's Dancing With the Stars "celebrities." The first time Nancy Grace does a dirty rumba, we're so out of there. Here's what grossed us out the most at the Pad:
If I had only two hours left to live, I would spend it watching last night's episode because it just would. not. end. Thanks to all of the unbearable moments below, I'm wondering if it's possible to have permanent douche chills.
While the first episode of Bachelor Pad mainly focused on Kasey, Vienna and Jake, the second episode had some genuinely dramatic moments... sandwiched in between more awkwardness between Vienna and Jake. Here are the craziest highlights:
The season premiere of Bachelor Pad revolved less around the house's potential hookups and mostly around the love/hate triangle of Jake, Vienna and Kasey. Is this going to be how the entire summer plays out? If so, I'm dreading it. I was actually hoping that Kasey would be eliminated and that Rated R would stick around. Yes, Rated R was the wrestler jerk who was dating multiple girls and got chased around bushes by Ali on The Bachelorette, but he was pretty amusing last night as he introduced himself to his partner while they were tangled up together, and when he compared Kasey and Vienna's relationship to Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy and even when he grabbed the rose off of Jake's chest on his way out the door.
While we can't help but admire Dan (Big Brother) and Nick (Bachelor Pad) for their bold power play moves this week, the below folks behaved badly for no real monetary reason.
Even though it was Labor Day weekend, people still worked hard at being obnoxious.
Here's a thought: Maybe don't blatantly lie and humiliate people national TV.
While June from Here Comes Honey Boo Boo has developed into the most fascinating person on TV, these other people were just horrible.
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