Lingering Questions from the Rock of Love Bus Premiere

by Angel Cohn January 5, 2009 3:50 pm
Lingering Questions from the <I>Rock of Love Bus</I> Premiere

So I just got a chance to watch the season premiere of Rock of Love: If this Bus Is a Rockin' Don't Come a Knockin' and I'm flabbergasted. I would have watched last night, but I was too busy writing about the quality program Superstars of Dance. Sigh. At least RoL:Bus was entertaining... if terrifying. Potes did a fabulous job of recapping this skanktastic episode, but there were some things I had to see with my very own eyes to believe, and now I need a long shower. But the whole thing left me with some burning questions (I hope I didn't contract something while watching it!) that I've listed below.

Rock of Love‘s Daisy Gets In a Sticky Situation

by Angel Cohn October 10, 2008 4:20 pm
<I>Rock of Love</I>‘s Daisy Gets In a Sticky Situation

Gentlemen, grab your condoms and head on over to the VH1 casting offices. You can win a chance to date Daisy de la Hoya, she of Rock of Love fame. You remember, she was the one that looked like Janice from The Muppet Show and was super slutty. So if you are one of those Plushies or have been dying to pick up Bret Michaels' sloppy seconds (and STDs), now's your chance. And there's good news for you internet porn lovers: you don't even have to move from your computer, you can apply online to be a part of the skankfest. And then fans, or people who can't turn away from this massive, disgusting trainwreck, can vote on whether you are worthy to compete for a chance at sleeping with getting a blow job from dating Daisy.

Meditations on the Daisy/Ambre Feud From A <I>Rock of Love</I> Innocent Someone named Daisy (who was described to me as "the one who looks like Janice from the Muppets" -- not helpful, Angel) recently told TMZ that she had done some dirty things with Bret Michaels, even though he has a girlfriend (someone named Ambre, which I'm told is pronounced "Amber" and not "Am-Bree" like it's spelled -- not helpful, whoever named Ambre). This has apparently become very big news because Ambre has taken to her Myspace blog to defend her man's honor. Keep in mind her man is Bret Michaels, so I don't really understand why she's bothering, but here's what she had to say:

"Daisy has no involvement with Bret and my relationship, therefore there is no validity to her statement."

So yeah, he totally nailed that Daisy person. Probably wore a red bandana when he did it, too. He's Bret Michaels. I'm Mindy Monez. I have no idea what I'm talking about.

Antonio Sabato Jr. Is No Bret Michaels

by Angel Cohn August 17, 2009 3:37 pm
Antonio Sabato Jr. Is No Bret Michaels

So it's not a big secret that my biggest guilty pleasure is Rock of Love. It's not just the insanely over the top drunken antics and really slutty girls that make this show so addictive, but it is also Bret himself. There's something oddly intriguing about the way he makes every girl, no matter if she's just puked her brains out or has spent the evening curled up with speed bump, feel like she's special. He's sort of a sweetheart underneath the fake hair, the gross bandanna and the rocker image. I was hoping that Antonio Sabato Jr.'s new show My Antonio would be similar to Rock of Love and fill that disease ridden void in my TV diet, but alas, it doesn't measure up. I worked up this little side-by-side comparison to prove my point.

TWoP 10: Shows That Should Return Next Fall (But Might Not)

We've already put out our plea for bubble show Chuck to return next fall, but plenty more of our favorites are in danger of falling through the network programming cracks. Here's nine more series that deserve another season, but may not get one. We know, we know, wishin' and hopin' didn't do Pushing Daisies any good, but we're sending out a prayer to the TV powers-that-be anyway: when upfront time rolls around in a month or so, please let at least some of these shows reappear on your schedules.

TWoP 10 Best Reality TV Smackdowns

by Angel Cohn August 8, 2008 8:00 am
TWoP 10 Best Reality TV Smackdowns Realizing that not everyone is a Big Brother junkie like moi, there was a massive verbal battle this week that went from a discussion to getting nearly everyone in the house in a senseless screaming match. It is way beyond convoluted to explain (though M.Giant did a good job attempting to) but it got us thinking about how reality shows are really at their best when people just let their freak flags fly and start swearing or punching. Honestly, we could fill this whole list with stupid stuff that had happened on Big Brother or A Shot at Love but I'm trying hard to give you a little bit of variety here. I'm told that's the spice of life. With that, here are some of the most disgusting or ridiculous squabbles ever to grace the small screen. Though I'm sure this list will be outdated by tomorrow.

Every Rose Has Its Thorn… Which Means Bret's Back, Baby

by Angel Cohn July 16, 2008 4:11 pm
Every Rose Has Its Thorn… Which Means Bret's Back, Baby

Finding love in the wild world of reality TV, it is just hard to know if a girl is a skank or a ho. If she's just a famewhore who wants some media attention, or if she really truly loves you with your venereal diseases and all. That's why Bret Michaels, who thought he found love twice before, is on the hunt again with Rock of Love 3. This is the most disgustingly awesome news we've heard all day.

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