Beware, Superman -- Smallville is doomed! Okay, that's been pretty self-evident since the third season, but this time it's for real! Remember back when Superman died? In the comics? Made a lot of newspapers? No? That's okay, it only lasted, like, a year. Anyway, the guy who killed him was a huge, ugly alien named Doomsday, and it looks like he's about to pull a repeat performance on Smallville as Doomsday...Bartender of DOOOOOMMMM!!!!
That's right, "Doomsday" is actually series regular David Bloome, who works as a bartender at a Metropolis nightclub. But he is no ordinary bartender (because that would be stupid). No, he is a outsider who feels isolated from society and who doesn't know his true origins, which apparently involve serial killing. Hmm. Will Clark Kent need to stop this monstrous mojito-maker towards the end of the season, possibly wearing the red-and-blue tights the producers told us he would never wear? Maybe! Will Doomsday kill Clark in a horrible, horrible way? We hope so! Will there be four new Supermen after that, each one more annoying than the last? Quite possibly! Actor Sam Witwer -- formerly Crashdown on BSG and soon to be the voice of Darth Vader's apprentice, Starkiller, in the Force Unleashed video game -- has been cast as this Sam Malone of the death service industry.
But Doomsday isn't the only new addition this season. Not only is Green Arrow going to be on the show full-time (yeah, he'll be a lot of help), a new girl has also been placed in charge of Lexcorp in Lex Luthor's absence/death. Her name? Tess. (Possibly short for Miss Teschmacher, if the show isn't done beating our nostalgia for the old Christopher Reeves films into the ground.) Played by relative newcomer Cassidy Freeman, Tess is blonde, super-powerful and will do anything to help Lex, although she is also a little hazy on her origins. Wait a minute -- the last time Superman died, Lex had a woman like that working for him, and her name...was Supergirl! (Technically, an alien shape-shifter who looked like Supergirl.) If we hadn't just seen a shape-shifting Supergirl last season, I would shout "yahtzee."
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