Next Monday night, after what is going to be a truly amazing Bachelor Pad episode ("Who has the worst boob job?" That show is so good I can't stand it) concludes, ABC will reveal the new cast of Dancing With the Stars. So naturally, rumors are already abounding as to who will be dancing for relevancy this fall, and most of them are pretty much the usual suspects. Let's go over their Dancing potential.
He's apparently their Kate Gosselin this season: their prized pig, their publicity cash cow, if you will. I'm a little burned out on Jersey Shore, but I think this is a good thing -- Situation is the biggest ham on that show and should fit in nicely with the elevated cheese factor on DWTS. He's also probably a terrible dancer, and we do tune in largely for the train wrecks.
Football players tend to do well here; we know that. But is Troy Aikman as graceful at this point as Jerry Rice, Emmitt Smith and Warren Sapp were when they were on? Maybe he is, I honestly have no idea. Obviously, for the aforementioned train wreck potential, I hope he isn't, but you know who they should get instead? Joe Montana. All those hours spent in Skechers Shape-Ups are going to waste.
Ali Fedotowsky and Roberto Martinez
Casting Bachelor and Bachelorette refugees on this show has become a tradition, but I for one don't hate it that much. A has-been is a has-been is a has-been, no matter which show they were originally on, and Ali has as much right as anybody in need of cash and publicity to be on DWTS. And besides, the most irritating thing about her is her giggling, and it's not like you're going to be able to hear it over the band's inspired covers of Katy Perry songs anyway. Just fast-forward through her rehearsal footage and you should be cruising through a giggle-free zone.
Note to ABC: The Hills viewers do not care about Audrina. If your goal is to bring in that show's fans, go after LC, Kristin, hell, even Justin fricking Bobby would be more compelling than this girl. Kelly Cutrone! Lo! Anybody else. And does DWTS think it's too good for Speidi? Please, this show has had Jake Pavelka, Tom DeLay and Heather Mills on it. It's not too good for anybody.
Your thoughts on the casting rumors? Leave them below, and then check out our list of the show's most ill-advised contestants ever.
What are the ten saddest reality shows on TV? Find out.
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