Hang it all! It just figures that I'm being made aware of this creepy-ass website that sells homemade dolls modeled on cult TV and film characters after I'd already dispensed my Hannukah wish list and given all of my various friends and relatives subsequent tongue-lashings for not adhering to said list. (Yes, in fact I DO need a cat fountain, but these Macy's gift cards will do I suppose.)

Oooooh, HBO is going all sorts of highbrow and getting Martin Scorsese to direct Empire, a new series about the glamorous days of 1920s Atlantic City [guffaw]. Now that Marty's former bitch Leo has decided to graduate to bigger and better things, it seems Scorsese has tapped a new place holder in the form of Michael Pitt, whom I always thought was sort of a poor man's Leo anyway. According to The Hollywood Reporter, Steve Buscemi will star as some bootlegger named Nucky Johnson and Pitt will play his protegee.

Growing up in the 1980s, I didn't watch a lot of traditional "holiday specials." No special guests coming over, no singing songs by the fire, nothing like that -- just Charlie Brown, the Grinch and little Ralphie for me. So all I know about the golden age of holiday specials is what I've seen parodied on Saturday Night Live ("I'm Gumby, dammit!"). But from what I've seen, Stephen Colbert really nailed it in A Colbert Christmas, his Comedy Central Christmas special, which aired last night, although I can only imagine that his was a million times funnier, and that this time the humor was intentional. I would even go out on a limb and call it a new holiday staple, like A Christmas Story, although I don't know if I'd want it to play 24 hours in a row. Here are the five funniest moments from last night's airing.

Because like misogynistic hayseeds, homophobes and self-important fashionistas, little innocuous supernatural procedurals need to be taken! Down! Ausiello is reporting that Sacha Baron Cohen's Bruno character managed to sneak onto the set of Medium a couple weeks ago, where he posed as an extra in a "tense courtroom scene," and proceeded to loudly interrupt filming until security dragged him out and production had to be shut down. Um... p0wn? I guess? I'm not saying it isn't kind of funny. I'm just saying your efforts could have been used to combat something truly evil like 90210 or 60 "If it didn't exist The Amazing Race could actually start on time" Minutes instead, Bruno.

Ostensibly Paul Rudd hosted this past week's Saturday Night Live, but the show was stolen right out from under him by one Mr. Justin Timberlake. The former host (whose "D**k in a Box" clip still cracks me up) showed up during Weekend Update to give a quick blow-by-blow of what next weekend's Thanksgiving-themed episode would have looked like if he hadn't had a scheduling conflict. This fast-paced rundown, followed by Timberlake's surprising cameo in heels and a leotard in a fake Beyoncé video shoot, were hands down the two funniest moments of the night. Rudd was forced to merely stand on the side lines and pretend to direct Sasha Fierce in the chaotic "Single Ladies" video while Timberlake shook and grinded (ground?) and got all the laughs.

That crazy old broad Babs Walters is at it again with her Ten Most Fascinating People of 2008 thingy. This year's lineup is fairly predictable, and I'm gonna go ahead and agree with roughly half of her choices, those being:

Of the two relationships currently entering crisis territory on The Office, only one threatens to be a real barn-burner... literally. Andy and Angela's impending nuptials at Schrute Farm may end in fire if Andy ever finds out about Angela's relationship with Dwight, so we talked to Ed Helms and Angela Kinsey, who play the not-so-happy couple, about what's going through their heads, and the heads of their characters.

The blogs have been abuzz for weeks about rumors that someone on Gossip Girl is gonna be killed off, and recent photos taken from the set featuring all of the major cast members congregated at Greenwood Cemetery in Brooklyn in their funereal finery seem to confirm the rumor. Everyone has his or her theory (and secret wish) as to who's gonna get it, but all signs thus far seem to point to Bart Bass, and last night's ep only served to confirm this. I'm referring specifically to the chain of events (Dan's thwarted exposé about Bart's shady past and the subsequent heart-to-heart between Bart and Chuck) that led to the revelation of Bart's humanity. Touching, yes, but it was also pretty inarguable proof that homeboy is going down.

Law & Order returns for its nineteenth season tonight, with a typically timely episode that will feature a stock broker being kicked to holy hell in broad daylight. I got a chance to listen in on a conference call with L&O genius Dick Wolf and my favorite District Attorney Jack McCoy ... er, Sam Waterston, and ask some probing questions about Law & Order making you fat and who Jack McCoy would be were he a Shakespearean character. Good questions, yes, but they stumped both of our otherwise very chatty interview subjects. I tell you, this call went on for hours, so I selected only the highlights, which included Dick Wolf talking ish on everything from the current TV season to Kevin Kline. Do not mess with Dick Wolf, people. Chunk-chunk.

I love me some Office, but my one complaint is that there isn't nearly enough of Kelly Kapoor, aka Mindy Kaling, whom I find delightful and hilar-ville. Hearing her winsome voice exclaim "Fashion show at lunch!" will just never get old, people. Which is why I'm stoked to start supplementing my Office viewing with a new web series I discovered (with the help of Jezebel) starring -- you guessed it -- one Ms. Kaling. Based on the name of the site that hosts it, I've gleaned that much of the content was developed during the writers' strike and ended up a sort of repository for projects that creative writer types worked on to keep their minds agile when they couldn't do their regular jobs. (Note: In perusing the site I also came across a web series called Global Warming, starring my imaginary best friend Kristen Wiig and The Daily Show's Aasif Mandvi, which looks promising, but I did not watch it. Just sayin'.)

Anycase, as you'll see from the three minutes-plus first episode, the series, House Poor, is about the (presumably at least partially autobiographical) trials Mindy faces after purchasing her first home. And hey! This one features Busy Phillips! Watch it aprés le jump. (That's French.)