As a long time Kristin Chenoweth hater, it is with great anguish that I type this next sentence: Kristin Chenoweth's musical parody of A&E's Intervention over at Funny or Die is not only not annoying, it's also actually pretty funny, even though she's starring in it and singing a song with that elf soprano voice of hers. But then again, who isn't wildly entertaining while singing about gay prostitutes who find their johns through Craig's List to score meth? (Tip to all the hookers out there: Finding your john through Craig's List erases the need for an abusive, money-stealing pimp. Don't ask me how I know, I just know.) Delightful musical clip after the jump, Broadway and meth junkies!

I suppose I should say "spoiler alert," but if you're reading the Telefile for TV news, you're begging for a good spoiling. (You naughty minx!) Even TV Guide isn't spoiler-free anymore, so you're going to have to bury yourself in a bomb shelter in order to avoid this tidbit of news. Ready? Last chance! Ana Lucia is coming back to Lost. ...You hear that? That's the sound of numerous Lost fans groaning in dismay. For a second there, I thought I was on the Dharma submarine, and we were about to implode.

For his next trick, David Blaine will don magnetic boots to walk upside down across a metal tight rope high above Central Park's Wollman Rink for three days straight. The special, entitled "Dive of Death" (and not "Douche 'N Boots," which is what I've named it), will air on ABC in late September. Why it's called "Dive of Death" instead of "Really High Tight Rope of Possible But Unlikely Death Due to the Aid of Magnetic Boots" is beyond me. Probably has something to do with character count limit or something. Anyway, after drowning himself, freezing himself, burying himself alive and all the other crazy things he's done for money, I'm just kind of underwhelmed by this one. The magnetic boots will allow him to be as sloppy as can be, even allowing him to sleep on the job (upside down like a bat, but still), which definitely sounds uncomfortable, but it also sounds like something anybody with a lot of patience and an insatiable need for attention could accomplish. I'll let this one slide, but I've got a few suggestions that will truly wow the public for Blaine's next trick.

Did you guys know that South Bend, Indiana is the style capital of the world? I'd never have guessed it growing up there, but now that I think about it, I guess it makes some sense. Two out of two stars of upcoming stylist-related reality shows are from there: Anne Slowey, fashion director of Elle Magazine and Miranda Priestley stand-in in the upcoming Devil Wears Prada-themed show Stylista , hails from said burg, as does Vivica A. Fox, she of the identically-themed VH1 show Glam God With Vivica A. Fox. It is true that despite the highest strip-mall per capita density I've ever encountered in my not at all scientific surveying of such things, South Bend does boast a handful of stylish folks with a genuine flair for fashion and an eye for creativity. This wholly includes -- and I'm not at all biased here people -- me and my girlfriends. And my mom, who rocked those louvered Kanye West sunglasses before every hip hop artist from here to Dubai got grabby with them. The rest of the town, from what I can tell, is happy to offer itself up to a rather limited array of designers that spans from the Gap to Dress Barn, with some Wet Seal thrown in for the under-fifty set (plenty of soccer moms think it's really cute to dress up like mall rat Lolitas but once they hit the big 5-0 they beggar off. Even they have standards to uphold!).

Imagine the Bachelorette, DeAnna Pappas, choosing her new bachelor with the help of Brad Womack. He's the guy that was about to propose to her, bought a ring, flew out her father and then last minute decided to dump her in front of America. Right, you must remember because he was the guy that stunned just about every Bachelor-loving fan out there (there must still be some, right?), especially DeAnna. And DeAnna talked about the event in every single episode of The Bachelorette. If you can imagine the incredibly awkward scenario of having Brad assist DeAnna in finding another man to fall head-over-heels for, you have just pictured the oddity that is Jo & Slade: Date My Ex.

Hey, remember those ads for Gossip Girl's first season that showed the teenage cast members totally getting it on? Well, the CW is stepping it up for the next season -- not only will the underage girls look even more orgasmic, but the previous campaign's "OMFG" tagline will be replaced by quotes from the press about the show... just not the glowing, sex-centric quotes you might expect.

My Diddy-centric loathing and resentment has been mounting for some time now. First there was that whole breaking J. Lo's heart thing. (For shame, Diddy!) Then there was the incessant name-changing PR bull-poop which was pointless and infuriating. More recently, the artist formerly known as Puff Daddy appeared as a caricature of himself in a new Burger King ad the premise of which is that he is so important and influential that Burger King need only let people know that "Diddy says BK is open late" before droves of people start flocking to their local meat patty purveyor. I resent that. Diddy is a hack. He might've been a somewhat astute businessman at one point, but from what I can tell, for the last six years or so, he's been living off the interest from capital he accrued as Notorious B.I.G.'s wingman. He claims he's a mogul. Just because you once had a PUH and like to hang out on yachts doesn't make you a scion, dude. Don't get it twisted.

Upon hearing the news that Hayden Panettiere was putting out a single, the first thought was, oh god not another one. We're wary of Hayden treading down the path that so many have misguidedly gone down before. Hayden's known for her lead role on the hit show Heroes, where she is praised for her acting talent. So why ruin her already strong reputation as an actress, with the debut of a solo CD.

Hey, remember "The One Where a Bunch of People Were Spreading the Rumor That There Was Going to Be a Friends Movie"? Yeah, well, apparently there isn't actually going to be one. It was all a clever ruse. Stupid rumor mill!

Did you hear? There might be a Friends movie in development. Once you stop plotzing, read about it on The Moviefile.