BLOGS

The Telefile
<I>90210</I>: Is Every Character Stupider Now That They’ve Graduated?

Now that everyone's finished high school, the 90210 writers had to find ways to keep the gang back together... so Annie's cash to go to the East coast fell through, Dixon decided to forgo college to pursue his music career, Liam went off to pretend like he was part of The Deadliest Catch and Navid is running a decidedly non-pornographic version of his father's film studio. But while many of them are involved in higher education, they seem to have all taken a healthy dose of stupid juice since they left West Beverly, as almost everyone has accidentally found themselves in some ridiculous situations. When guest star Kellie Pickler is playing a version of herself and seems like the show's most intelligent character... you know you've got problems. Here's what's going on:

Annie Is an Accidental Hooker
Annie went out to dinner with a sorority sister and some of her rich older "friends" and didn't put together the whole escort thing. When she found out about it, she continued escorting for cash to pay for her education (don't hookers always say that?). But last week she proved she was an even bigger moron by having sex with a client... for NO MONEY at all. Figures that she's not even good at this job.

Dixon Is an Accidental Drug Addict
While trying to get his album done, Dixon was having trouble concentrating and staying awake. His new roomie Austin tossed him some ADHD medicine, which Dixon started taking like crazy and even buying on the black market. But he's too dumb to even realize that he's now a drug addict, and just thinks it's natural to crash on a beach chair for days at a time.

Liam Is an Accidental Model/Bar Owner
After returning from Alaska, Liam proposed to Annie (unwisely), then went on a drunken bender that led to him buying a beach bar from the dad from Boy Meets World... even though he's only 19 or something. The logistics worked out, and when he was having trouble making ends meet, he had Silver make a commercial (which was mostly about his taut ab muscles) and is now earning $10 grand at a time for modeling gigs. Some kids have all the luck -- and he's luckiest of all, because he's not saddled with Annie forever.

Silver Is Accidentally a Teen Parent
Navid's family returned to join his father in their home country, except for his insolent sister who only has a year left of high school. So Silver let the bratty teen move into the one-bedroom apartment that she shares with Navid, and suddenly had to deal with grounding and other annoying parenting issues.

Navid Is Accidentally Running a Chop Shop
Navid's aforementioned awful sister hooked up with a guy who was happy to extort money from Navid. Except that he didn't have any. So Navid borrowed some cash from his porn-making uncle, who asked to use space in the back of Shirazi studios. Except he wasn't making his underage porn films, he was running a chop shop. Because Navid is too ignorant to understand how the law works, the uncle got Navid tangled into the mess, paying him to keep quiet with large sums of cash in brown paper bags.

Adrianna Is an Accidental Waitress
From former pop star to waitress in unfortunate footwear at Liam's bar in one fell swoop. She went in to the bar to make amends with her friends and has ended up waiting tables at a dead end job. And thinking that random guys are stalking her... when they aren't.

Naomi Is Accidentally Sleeping With a Cowboy
She hasn't gotten significantly stupider, but did end up sleeping with the guy whom she bought her house from because of his Southern charm. And she acts like a total moron when he's around. At least she hasn't dressed up like an Avatar character this season. And she's somehow president of the sorority of misfit girls, which is the most enjoyable thing she's done in a while.

Think you're a TV or movie expert? Prove it! Play Trivia Without Pity, our new online trivia game with over 2,000 questions about the shows and films you love -- and love to hate.

What are people saying about your favorite shows and stars right now? Find out with Talk Without Pity, the social media site for real TV fans. See Tweets and Facebook comments in real time and add your own -- all without leaving TWoP. Join the conversation now!

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

MOST RECENT POSTS

BLOG ARCHIVES

The Telefile

March 2014

25 ENTRIES

February 2014

24 ENTRIES

January 2014

43 ENTRIES

December 2013

15 ENTRIES

November 2013

28 ENTRIES

October 2013

40 ENTRIES

September 2013

37 ENTRIES

August 2013

16 ENTRIES

July 2013

15 ENTRIES

June 2013

26 ENTRIES

May 2013

38 ENTRIES

April 2013

43 ENTRIES

March 2013

35 ENTRIES

February 2013

58 ENTRIES

January 2013

62 ENTRIES

December 2012

48 ENTRIES

November 2012

60 ENTRIES

October 2012

71 ENTRIES

September 2012

67 ENTRIES

August 2012

66 ENTRIES

July 2012

51 ENTRIES

June 2012

60 ENTRIES

May 2012

70 ENTRIES

April 2012

73 ENTRIES

March 2012

72 ENTRIES

February 2012

64 ENTRIES

January 2012

80 ENTRIES

The Latest Activity On TwOP