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The Telefile
Good news, everybody! Weird news, but still! Really good! It looks like the bleak hell that has become Ed McMahon's life has suddenly become slightly less horrifying, thanks to... Donald Trump, of all people. Homeboy has agreed to buy McMahon's $4.6 million dollar mansion and let him live in it for free, saving it from foreclosure and McMahon from certain homelessness. Aww. Why would he do this, you ask? According to Trump, it's just because a long time ago he went to a fancy school none of us can afford/get into and don't you effing forget it, and while he was there he loved to watch what I can only assume was The Tonight Show. He told the L.A. Times, "When I was at the Wharton School of Business I'd watch him every night. How could this happen?"

Wow, $4.6 million dollars is a long way to go for a little press, so as much as I hate to admit it, I think Donald Trump may have done a sincerely nice and generous thing just... to help someone? I'm not exaggerating when I say that, after this, I wouldn't be surprised if Hitler himself rose from the dead to attend law school solely to do a little pro bono work defending Ed McMahon in the bazillion lawsuits currently filed against him. That's how weird this is. But anyway, good for you, Donald Trump! If hell exists, maybe you won't go there after all!

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