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<I>Bad Girls Club</I>: New Season, More Slapping Than Ever

The show starts off with a screaming, slapping and hair-pulling fight that's unfolding in the midst of a car with three of the new girls, and that's before the episode even starts. They then pull back to let us know that it's 17 days after their first meeting. It's a little sneak preview of what we can expect from the baddest batch of bad girls ever. Personally, I didn't think they could find a more heinous batch of girls than they had last season. And I was wrong, though I'm not sure anyone will ever be as awesome as the marvel that was Tanisha.

The new girls aren't in the house a day before they have already done some breaking and entering, topless sunbathing, gotten kicked out of a club, attacked someone who isn't on the show and had a raging bitchfest that involved every single member of the house. If you are into the trashier reality fare, this show is for you. It makes Rock of Love: Charm School look almost tame in comparison. Though I do shudder to think that there are so many people who indulge in this sort of appalling behavior on a regular basis, and are willing to show off their worst side to the world in order to get 15 minutes of fame on a reality show. At least Charm School ostensibly is trying to get them to be better people, not sure what the lesson here at Bad Girls Club is, since as the seasons have gone on, there seems to be less and less keeping them in check and more and more alcohol readily available. I mean, this is a house that has a vending machine filled with sex toys, and trashy makeup and hooker shoes just laying around for general usage. Or maybe the gals just know what they are signing up for and are just upping their attitudes, because it seems highly unlikely that anyone could be this awful all the time.

First Impressions of the Girls:

Sarah: She's from Milwaukee and says she's a very sexual person and likes to "fuck the hell" out of people she finds attractive. She loves being naked and she recently shot some pictures for Playboy. Interesting. I'm sure if she employs the tactics that she does on this show in real life, she gets everything she wants really cheaply. I mean, she's the one who was topless sunbathing and when hot repairman showed up to fix the window, she greeted him with the twins hanging out for the entire world to see. The editors are going to have a field day with blurring this one.

Tiffany: Despite the fact that she has what looks to be an ugly ass Dodge Ram tattoo on the front of her shoulder (maybe she's just an Aries, but it looks just like the truck logo), she actually seems to be a nice person. The Chicago girl claims to be "the warden" and she doesn't start shit, but will finish it, but when the house explodes into a fiery pit of hate, she stays out of the whole debacle. So far, she seems the least bad, or she's waiting to see which side she wants to be on.

Whitney: Think of every stereotype you've ever heard about Boston. Got them in your mind? Great. All of them can be applied to Whitney, who in the course of her first 24 hours in the house must have told her roomies that she's from Boston at minimum 50 times. In an early interview she explains, "I'm a Boston girl, which means, 'Go fuck yourself.'" Charming. I'm from New England and know a lot of Boston girls. None of them have ever described themselves, or their hometown, in exactly those words. She also doesn't want lesbian girls to hit on her in the house. And she's adamant that slutty girls keep their extracurricular activities confined to the bedroom. When one of the Ambers asks if it is OK to have sex on the kitchen counter (one of the few places that Whitney didn't specifically deem off-limits) it looks like Whit is going to pass out. On the plus side, she's way more interesting than that Whitney girl from The Hills. She awesomely gets blackout boxer rages and just doesn't remember punching people. It's like she's on autopilot. Incredible.

Amber B: She says that she hates girls and cheats on her boyfriends and claims that she's just a bad person to know. At first the model didn't seem so bad, but then she started saying some assy things... like she doesn't like people with accents. And then she fueled the flames for Amber M., so maybe she is a total bitch. She was kinda awesome though when she busted the window in order to get into the house. It's not her fault that the reality producers basically goaded her into it by not leaving a key around in a place where it could be easily found. Taking a sword off a nearby statue and smashing a window is totally the most logical step.

Amber M.: She says that girls are jealous of her and that's she's not bad, she's just misunderstood. No. She's a racist asshole. She's not very bright, has never heard the term Kiwi in reference to folks from New Zealand before (likely because she never stopped talking long enough to hear anything that anyone else had to say). She also asked Ailea (who is part Kiwi and part Filipino) if she could do a good Asian accent. For real. She also has teeny feet, likes her own space, thinks she might be just a wee bit high maintenance and basically asks the girls if they'll clean up her messes. She'll pay them, of course. It's not like she expects them to be slaves, just servants. She really doesn't get why most of the house (except for the other Amber) hates her guts. I kinda cheered when KC poured a drink over her head.

Ailea: She seems like a nice girl. But she claims to like to make people mad. Which is apparently code for stirring up shit. She's definitely the instigator in the whole Amber M. vs. House fight, since she is the one who related the racist story for everyone and stoke the fires in the diary room.

Kayla: I saved the best/worst for last. Straight out of Compton, it's KC. She's kind of horrible, but definitely interesting to watch as she goes from zero to screaming fighting mode less than ten seconds. By way of introduction she says, "Look bitches, I don't tolerate bullshit. I'm gonna fuck you up." Then she calls her grandmother a bitch, because Nana had the good sense to kick her ass to the curb when she found out that her granddaughter was going to be on the trashiest reality show of them all. She thinks everyone is out to get her, which is probably true since she's kinda nuts. She fights with strangers at bars at the drop of the hat, or because of any murmured comment. In the first two days she gets them kicked out of two nightclubs and a restaurant because of her tendency to throw down. She's very volatile and was about to go off on the entire house because she thought someone stole her bag. Turns out it was in her closet, where she left it, the entire time. Little bitchy and untrustworthy Amber M. had no idea what hit her.

So that's the new batch of girls. Seems like it will be another wild season. I'm still not entirely sure what the point of this show is -- you don't really become a more valuable member of society, you don't land a rich man and they aren't celebrities, but yet, I keep watching. Strange.

Your take on the new season? Let us know.

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