This show is so terribly written and not funny that it doesn't warrant a real review -- except that I will say that it's obviously trying quite hard to be an Arrested Development rip-off with its characters -- but rather, a list of the moments from the pilot episode that made me cringe So, without further ado...
0:26 Terry (Lea Remini) saying, "Sometimes 'family' means locking out emergency personnel until your uncle promises to work on his heart health."
0:40 "I'm a healthcare professional!" "You're a masseuse!"
1:30 "Something about it says he really needs me!" [Text message: "I NEED YOU"]
3:37 The music cue when Jack (Kyle Bornheimer) finds out he's going to be roommates with his 15-year-old cousin.
4:45 Tony's (J.K. Simmons) heart monitor rising as Jack's telling him he'll take over the family business.
5:36 The introduction of the business's assistant's sister (Danielle Nicolet), who you know will end up with Jack.
6:17 The actual introduction of the business assistant, Darren (Edi Gathegi).
6:47 "Nah, he cool, I left him a sandwich."
7:23 Darren calling Jack "Pimp Juice."
7:34 God, just everything about Darren in general.
8:00 Whatever that interaction was with Darren's friend
8:54 "I called you to re-plank my deck." "Good thing your shirt's tucked in."
10:47 Honestly, there were a bunch of interactions at the hardware store, but my eyes kept glazing over.
11:26 The guy stealing supplies from the van while the neighbor runs Jack over with a go-kart.
11:45 I just want to point out that the only black man on this show so far has been characterized as a dumb, lazy womanizer who smells bad.
13:13 "I got rid of my first husband by pretending to be really bad at sex for three years."
14:28 Darren keeps his coffee in a 40 because he owes a guy money, which is stupider than it is racist, somehow.
15:22 "Quit being a slut, Lees, it makes me ashamed you're my sister."
17:04 Jack fires a nail through his foot with minimal reaction.
17:54 Tony has another heart attack.
19:43 "Turns out, fixing decks is easier than fixing people."
Think you've got game? Prove it! Check out Games Without Pity, our new area featuring trivia, puzzle, card, strategy, action and word games -- all free to play and guaranteed to help pass the time until your next show starts.
MOST RECENT POSTS