If you weren't particularly impressed by House of Lies' pilot episode -- what with its annoyingly exposition-heavy fourth-wall breaking, so-smirky-you-want-to-punch-them-in-the-face characters and sex scenes that try way too hard to be risqué -- trust us: it does get better. By the third episode of Showtime's newest comic serial, set in the high-powered world of management consulting, the writing has settled down somewhat and the main ensemble has developed a great rapport that helps overcome the at-times shaky material. Even then, House of Lies isn't smart or savvy enough to rank with cable's best comedies (like, say, Curb Your Enthusiasm or The League), but at least it develops into a decent half-hour diversion.

No fan of The Simpsons will argue that the quality of the show hasn't declined since the "classic" days of the show, most often considered seasons 1-10. That being said, the 450th Episode "Once Upon A Time In Springfield" and "The Simpsons 20th Anniversary Special: 3-D! On Ice!" episodes last night were terrific and a lot of fun for a forever-obsessed fan like myself.

When 2001-present writer Matt Warburton joked, "I think that Internet message boards used to be a lot funnier 10 years ago. And I've sort of stopped reading their new posts," I thought about the quality of the 450th episode and argue that the writing still has the potential to be as sharp as it was in the classic episodes. For that reason, I give you the moments that reminded me of The Simpsons of yesteryear.

I recently watched the original V mini-series in preparation for the new show, and I have to say, I learned a lot of important things from it. I now know that secret lizard people are, first of all, a very real and imminent threat, and secondly, fairly easy to identify, if you know how to spot them. They tend to be polite, attractive, averse to science professionals, partial to mind control, onesies and easily manipulated members of the press, and above all intent on storing humans as personal slaves and/or food sources. Of course, I know plenty of people like that; I watch TV all day. Here are the most likely secret lizard people walking amongst our favorite shows.

I swear I'm not a heartless bitch -- well, most of the time. I totally teared up when Michelle was reunited with her dad on The Biggest Loser this past week, so I'm not utterly unfeeling. But I tried watching Secret Millionaire last night. It's got a nice Extreme Makeover kind of premise about it. Multi-millionaires go undercover to live in the real world to see how poor, or regular, people survive. Then after a week, they give them money out of their own pocket. It's kind of like what Greg Garcia did during the writers strike, but, you know, filmed for television.

You know how every news outlet in the Western Hemisphere reported that Lipstick Jungle had been canceled last week? Well, according to Brooke Shields that was all a lie! She told NY Mag yesterday that "it's erroneously presented that we've been canceled, thank God." And went on to add, "Our bosses are saying, 'You're not canceled, don't worry.'" Really, Brooke Shields? Because what we've heard is that the writers have cleaned out their offices, and that you've been, you know, shitcanned. Looks like somebody went to the Denise Richards School of Cancellation Denial, where if you say your show is picked up to the press enough times, it will magically become true, despite insurmountable cause and reason to cancel it. But hey, if it keeps Kim Raver away from 24, I say we renew this thing for the next 10 years, NBC!