If I were grading this episode by numbers, I'd have to take off major points for every time someone used the word "nailed" (or any form thereof) to talk about sex acts. Nailing someone's mouth in particular rubbed me the wrong way. It got to the point by the end of "Parking Spot" that I was physically cringing whenever it happened. And I didn't love that Winston was again separated with his own subplot that started out entertaining and then waned, but I do appreciate the way they are dealing with the Nick/Jess stuff, and some of the random callbacks to previous episodes (Coach!), so if there is a TV curve, this would probably get bumped up to a solid "A" after seeing Kat Dennings play with marionettes and Andy Dick on 2 Broke Girls.

Do's
- Nick making things more awkward with Jess: "Yeah, and then we can have sex."

- The shout-out to Coach (in the No Nail Oath), the towel rack breaking when Schmidt stormed out of the bathroom and Schmidt's odd nipple placement.

- Self-deprecating Schmidt: "I'm the dumbest boy in school. "

- Outside Dave: "He threw his dentures at me. He doesn't like cookies."

- Pretty sure Scott Caan didn't say this, but it still made me laugh. "'Destiny might be a lady, but victory has a penis.' Direct quote, Scott Caan."

- Nick's continued lack of effort: "Why do you two care about stuff so much?"

- Winston's condom alternatives: "You got a grocery bag? Tinfoil? Hand sanitizer? A shower cap and a twist tie?"

- Adorably clueless Nick: "I don't know what mazel tov means, but it doesn't sound good."

- Nick's cardboard car hiding place: "Five bucks if you help me fold this nicely. I'm not going above six, so don't negotiate with me."

- Jess's idea of being sexy: "I shook what the good people of Oregon gave me and I got a parking spot."

- Nick's twitching: "Weird. Weird! Weird!"

- Disgusting, and yet fascinatingly so. "Did you just pee inside your body?"

- The one acceptable use of "nail": "What fuels men? Competition and sex. That's why the United Nations was formed. That's why girls aren't allowed on pirate ships, and that is why there is a No Nail Oath in apartment 4D. "

- Jess making fun of her own fashion sense: "I know nothing about men, that's why I'm wearing a short skirt and wool tights. "

- Winston bothering Cece for a condom, only because Cece called him out on his inappropriateness and lack of actual personal connection to her.

- Nick making Jess drop her fishsticks: " It was me, Jess. I couldn't help it... I don't regret kissing you. I regret what it did. I regret that it made things weird. "

- The Schmidt and Jess kiss, even though I object to the reasoning behind it, was just so oddly wonderful to see.

Don'ts
- Schmidt might have got a bit too far in his parking spot obsession: "Give me the spot or I'll kill you all."

- Jess's go-to reaction is a purple nurple? Really?

- Jess using her feminine wiles to manipulate Nick to give her a parking spot, knowing how odd things are after their kiss. Seemed mean-spirited, though her hair looked ah-mazing.

- Winston's sex window: "If you all will excuse me, I am going to park my car on her parking spot."

- Winston in the drug store was just embarrassing, though I did like that he wore "Yum" sweatpants.

- Jess didn't want to leave litter on the ground, was overly polite about letting a car pass her and paused to take pictures of cats on her car, but yet she'd go and actually hit Schmidt's car with hers and destroy personal property? I don't buy it.

- Schmidt actually peeing on himself.

- The fact that there is a No Nail Oath, and that it had fine print and involved the other roommates getting to have sex with Jess if one does... presumably without her consent.

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