You'd think nothing... but you'd be wrong. On last night's episode, I was watching the giggly hostess of Wipeout (aka Jill Wagner) on an episode of Bones where she played a skanky girl who was almost charged with murdering her lovah. She's trying to work some weird accent here (ineffectively, as she loses it part of the way through) but like, it was hilarious to me to see a woman who interviews grown men in toucan costumes for a living trying to play something a little more gritty. And really, she was better than I expected, because on Wipeout she can't keep a straight face to save her life and she flubs lines and names constantly (which is part of her charm).
I normally stay away from politics (well, unless they are on 24 or The West Wing) but I couldn't help myself when we saw that Sarah Palin (John McCain's running mate) had give all her children unusual names (Track, Bristol and Trig? Really?) and that two of the girls just happened to share names with famous TV witches. No, there's not a Sabrina or Samantha, but instead she's named them Piper and Willow (see clips after the jump if you have no idea who we're talking about, or are suffering through withdrawal). Palin is only 44 and clearly could have been a fan of the addictive WB dramas, and been inspired to give her kids these TV-centric names. Seems too unusual to just be random. Now do you think it is just a coincidence that a probable fan of The WB is plucked out of relative obscurity (she lives in Alaska) the very same week the WB launched their new site with these shows on them?
Last night NBC kicked off their fall lineup with the premiere of the reality series America's Toughest Jobs. I'm a huge fan of the shows The Deadliest Catch and Ice Road Truckers but was honestly skeptical if show that puts untrained contestants into these impossible situations would really entertain me. Surprisingly, it did. I thought it would pale in comparison to the actual shows about professionals, but I was hooked from the moment these newbies or "greenhorns" stepped on to a crab fishing boat and were initiated by biting the head off of a bait fish.
Another contender for the title of world's most moronic television show. The World of Stupid which apparently aired somewhere or other in 2004 is now airing in the vast wasteland that is known as Fox Reality Channel. It is a Jackass-esque show, that travels around the globe to see the dumb things that people do to each other. Apparently, hitting each other in the crotch to see what happens is the universal language of "comedy." The theme song/intro is so beyond cheesy and loungy and I love British announcer guy. Below are the idiots of Wales. There are lovely castles and people who like to hit each other in the back with racquetballs just for the fun of it. Or, say, drive nails through their skin. Just because. Basically it is the global Jackass without Johnny Knoxville, Bam or Weeman. Watch at your own risk. I think, however, that it may be better than Hurl!
I've been passing this Busty Heart clip around to all my friends, who then proceed to yell at me, for the last few days and wasn't going to foist it upon our readers, but people, if you haven't seen this clip from America's Got Talent you must watch it now (or maybe not now since it probably isn't safe for work at most companies and really probably not something you want to watch if you've just eaten lunch). Personally, I don't watch this show and this is the reason why. I think that it is a damn shame that someone that has this much talent was denied a chance to move on. But then I get to wondering, how does one learn that they have this particular skill? I presume that they are drunk and forced to do it on a dare and then began using it to impress/scare friends at parties. That's all I can figure. It sure does beat watching a guy juggle.
You've probably heard about this Baby Borrowers show, right? You know, the one where five teenage couples are given the responsibility of caring for infants, toddlers, teenagers, and the elderly... Good luck! It will be like watching Jamie-Lynn Spears and her fiancé care for their new baby girl. Although I haven't yet seen the show, I can already determine the outcome just by looking at the preview clip (see below). They think they are responsible and well equipped to handle screaming babies at 2 AM. You know, because they are "mature" for their age. Give the couples five hours, they will be crying, screaming at one another and pulling their hair out. Give them one week and they are exhausted, need a break, and realize this is a lot harder than it seems. Give them the full six weeks and all five couples realize how much work caring for another human being really is. The social experiment will hopefully teach them what it really means to compromise and to take on adult responsibility. I don't even need to watch the show to know what happens, but it might be pretty entertaining to watch ten teenagers fail miserably... or maybe learn a thing or two.
Colbert's at his finest in this clip. He's all up in arms because kids are eating healthier foods instead of snacking on cookies. Fruit that isn't in loop or pebble form? That's positively un-American (his words, but I completely agree... just don't let my nutritionist find out.) Anyway, he blames this trend squarely on the shoulders of one Mr. Cookie Monster. And that is exactly where this belongs. Ever since the muppet started in with the "cookies are a sometimes food" shtick, kids are following his example, and maybe some adults too. Not Colbert though, he gets in an intense debate with the googly-eyed creature who ends up revealing way too much about his "Robert Downey Jr." like addictions to the delicious treats. This clip may be NSFW just because you'll be cracking up so much. It's a good thing my office mate is home sick today.
I was curious about this soapy internet "series" called Foreign Body, which is doled out in 40 two to three minute installments. It is essentially a medical thriller about a seedy company trying to keep people from traveling abroad for cheap surgeries by hiring "undercover" innocent nurses to prove that it is unsanitary and deadly. It's from the mind of beach read writer Robin Cook, loosely based on his forthcoming novel, and stars no one you've ever heard of, but it isn't until like installment eight or so that you really have any sense of what is going on since the "episodes" are so short. Oh, and there is one character who is always taking her clothes off and rubbing her stomach suggestively. So odd. I can't help but wonder if they made Mother, May I Sleep With Danger today, if it would have been parsed out in drips and drabs on the internet keeping people coming back every week to see how Tori Spelling would stupidly fall for Ivan Sergei even though he was a totally bastard, instead of just airing it as one two hour Lifetime movie. I totally digress ... here's the first installment which is pretty, but forgettable. All I know is I just got to an episode where they create a computer program called trojan.ho, and now I can't stop myself from watching because it is so ridiculous.
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