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The Telefile
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo: This Week's Signs of the Apocalypse

There's been some controversy over the news that the Shannon family only makes between $2,000 and $4,000 an episode -- a figure that June scoffs at. To that I say: Good for her. I hope that TLC is shelling out lots of money to this clearly low-income family, especially considering poor Sugar Bear has to work seven days a week to provide for his ladies. Rather than getting too deep into Honey Boo Boo politics, though, let's just enjoy the more bizarre and unsettling moments of "Shh! It's a Wig."

Because of the 108-plus-degree weather, the girls decide they'll stay inside to "dig [their] boogers, watch TV and eat all day," which June points out is what they already do all day. (Fortunately, Sugar Bear buys the kids a pool, and we see Alana splash around in it... while the duct-taped hose connected already begins to start leaking... ominous!)

Sugar Bear does a TH where there's visible crusty chewing tobacco on the sides of his lips (sadly, he is not wearing a mullet wig in this particular scene, nor the frock that made Alana giggle and shout, "You look like Nana!" But still, he works seven days a week, provides a sense of stability to several daughters who don't share his DNA and makes family dinner a priority, so good for him).

June allows Alana to order a "three-combo" which either includes or is in addition to servings of ribs, barbequed chicken, potato salad and baked beans.

Pumpkin squeezes ketchup into her bag of chips before eating them.

June's daughters think that she doesn't want to get married because she won't fit into a wedding dress.

Chubbs (15-year-old Jessica) farts on Pumpkin to close out the family dinner sequence.

Chubbs washes her hair in the sink, revealing that the sink water, rather than going down into pipes, empties out into a bucket that they must empty outside each and every time.

The family and their friends ride four-wheelers to a "department store," which turns out to be an overstuffed decrepit dumpster. Alana reveals that "all Pumpkin's clothes come from the dumpster." (Along with the sink bucket, the poor-shaming on TLC's behalf in this episode is by far the most heinous crime committed.)

A family friend throws a filthy blanket onto Alana and wraps Pumpkin in a dirty mattress, to the delight of onlookers.

June describes a wet towel wrapped around her head as a "redneck air conditioner," saying, "It keeps you cool, keeps you wet" and is a "wet t-shirt contest all in one."

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