Oh Dick Wolf, what would a world without you look like? Where would we be without your deft interpretations of lurid tabloid dramas and celebrity dust-ups? Without that masterful way you have of weaving narratives loosely based on real events so that in our collective memory, we draw just as often from the truths you invent as the one supplied by the New York Post, US Weekly, et al? For tomorrow night's L&O season finale we get yet another ripped-from-the-headlines tale, this one owing its plot to the recent Spitzer/call-girl fiasco. It was only a matter of time, you realize. I wonder how literally the show's gonna take this puppy. The governor is played by the fully follicled Tom Everett Scott, rather than a balding Spitzer look-alike, but are we still going to have to suffer through scenes of him going to town on his special lady friend while sporting classy black dress socks? Le shudder.

Tags: David Cross, Dick Wolf, Eliot Spitzer, Kristy Swanson, Law & Order

Law & Order returns for its nineteenth season tonight, with a typically timely episode that will feature a stock broker being kicked to holy hell in broad daylight. I got a chance to listen in on a conference call with L&O genius Dick Wolf and my favorite District Attorney Jack McCoy ... er, Sam Waterston, and ask some probing questions about Law & Order making you fat and who Jack McCoy would be were he a Shakespearean character. Good questions, yes, but they stumped both of our otherwise very chatty interview subjects. I tell you, this call went on for hours, so I selected only the highlights, which included Dick Wolf talking ish on everything from the current TV season to Kevin Kline. Do not mess with Dick Wolf, people. Chunk-chunk.

Tags: Brad Pitt, Dick Wolf, George Clooney, Kevin Kline, Law & Order, Sam Waterston

When news broke in May that Katee Sackhoff would be following BSG with a fun (and knowing that show, downright filthy!) guest stint on Nip/Tuck, I could hardly contain my excitement. Since then, thoughts like, "Starbuck as a love interest for Sean? Yes!" "Ooh, I bet Christian'll try to steal her!" "Julia's going to be so jealous! I don't even care that she's a lesbian now!" and so on and so forth have been whirring around in my head almost non-stop. Sadly, that all came to an end today when my Starbuck-guesting-on-Nip/Tuck dreams were dashed against the rocks, and everything about it got really annoying.

Tags: Battlestar Galactica, Dick Wolf, Katee Sackhoff, Lost and Found, Nip/Tuck