Now, imagine this was a bloody railroad! Sounds amazing, right?!
I have a bone to pick with you, Sesame Street. I'll give you the Feist sing-along skit -- who can really eff with "1 2 3 4 Monsters Walking 'Cross the Floor"? And I'll most assuredly give you St. Neil as the Shoe Fairy because, um, genius? But what's all this celeb-courting, high-concept, vaguely inappropriate biznass of late? When you have Kim Cattrall invoking her sexed up cougar incarnation Samantha Jones in close proximity to Oscar's trash can, I can't help but wonder if things have gone a little too far. Playing up to the parents is nothing new -- cuz really, is a kid who doesn't yet know how to control his bowels gonna get a 30 Rock parody? -- but when we have Jonah Hill, who is known nearly exclusively for playing sailor-mouthed stoners, waxing poetic about mustaches that look like outtakes from a seventies porno, it's time to rein it the hell in. What sorts of values are we teaching kids when a talking cake tries to make out with Jessica Alba? US Weekly will have them in a death vice soon enough. Does the one unspoiled place where a kid can hang out with monsters and learn to tie his shoes in peace need to beat the trashy tabs to the punch?
Former Dawson's Creek cutie Katie Holmes made a big splash this week when it was announced that she'd be returning to the small screen in a guest role on Eli Stone. Her former co-star Joshua Jackson also landed a gig on the hopefully decent fall series Fringe. Not to even mention that practically the entire cast of 90210 is either heading back for the spinoff or adamantly denying that they are (they'll change their minds in a year.) Apparently everything old (well, 15 years old) is new again. Yay! Here are the ten people we'd really like to see back on the small screen in a nice juicy recurring role or guest gig.