I believe this is what they call "the light at the end of the tunnel."
Greetings, faithful awards show enthusiasts! Tonight we wrap up the 2011 awards season with the biggest, fanciest, loooongest of them all with a blow-by-blow liveblog of the Academy Awards. Mindy will start things off, swapping with Zach every half hour until the bitter end. Let's hope for some surprises, some wardrobe malfunctions and as many mercifully short acceptance speeches as humanly possible. Either way, we'd love to hear from you in the comments. Let's go!
These two guys are hosting the Oscars. In the words of fake Joy Behar, "So what? Who cares?"
It's Oscar night! The most predictable Oscar night in recent memory! Hopefully some surprises and upsets occur, and that Jack Donaghy and Gavin Volure are hilarious, but either way, we will be here all night long, liveblogging the events. Zach Oat and Mindy Monez will be switching off writing duties every half hour until the bitter end. Let's go!
Good afternoon and welcome to your Friday TWOP News: pre-Oscars edition. I'm sure you've all started your second-by-second Oscar countdowns, painstakingly viewed all the Best Documentary Short and Sound Mixing nominees in order place your bets most effectively, and made a shopping excursion to purchase the themed snacks you will begin eating when red carpet coverage starts at approximately 3 AM (Milk Duds, anyone?)...oh wait, that's just me? Hmmm... hmmm. While I wrap my mind around that, go ahead and wrap your minds around these delicious Friday news bites.
In case you're not so over the whole thing already that you're under it -- and Joe R and I have pretty much had it with the Academy by this point -- here's a quick rundown of notable coverage around the internet.
You can start right here on TWoP with the real-time blog of the telecast, featuring me, Joe R, Odie, and Matt Zoller Seitz. We've also put together a Fametracker-style Galaxy Of Fame that you may care to enjoy.
Elsewhere, Joe R presents his alternative nominees; Green Cine Daily analyzes the victories (and offers a buttload of links to other critiques of the telecast, the winners, and What It All Means); A.O. Scott puts the Oscars in context; and you aren't only one wondering what the F was going on with some of those outfits (no more drunk stitch-and-bitches for you, Mrs. Day-Lewis) -- the Fug Girls have got you covered.
Yesterday, they finally announced who would be hosting the Academy Awards ceremony next year, after it was revealed that Hugh Jackman would not return following last year's show-stopping performance. And the lucky host is... Alec Baldwin. And Steve Martin. Both of them. Because... it's... uh... huh? True, Baldwin just won his second Emmy in a row, and Martin has hosted the Oscars twice before, but this really makes zero sense to us, for the following reasons.
Stars on TV is the name of the game, as one movie star is going to Fox, two are going to ABC, and one (along with two infamous housewives) is coming to NBC. Michelle Obama, meanwhile, is going on Iron Chef. Keep her safe, Mark Dacascos. Keep her safe.
While we were naively optimistic about the Golden Globes, that's not the case with Sunday night's Oscar telecast. We're pretty much dreading it. The fact that the whole thing has been shrouded in secrecy with only drips and drabs trickling out has not done much to up our anticipation. Instead, it's filling us with feelings of horror and panic. Especially since what we have heard is pretty much a nightmare. So without further ado... the reasons we're not looking forward to the 81st Annual Academy Awards.