Poor Super Bowl XLVII. It's only the third most-watched program in TV history.
Unlike Grandpa Munster, NBC has quit playing games with Bryan Fuller's heart.
It's the Monday after the Super Bowl, and though this year the game may have overshadowed the commercials (imagine that!) we still must discuss the best and worst multi-million dollar spots of the night. Because as usual, some of them were downright embarrassing. I've tackled the regular commercials below, and Zach has rounded up the most significant movie spots here, for all your Captain America and Thor needs.
If Smash is NBC's new Friends, is everyone going to start sporting "The Marylin"? I'll be here all week, folks.
Before I get into the trainwreck that was the Black Eyed Peas' tacky halftime show, I've got to at least briefly talk about the nightmare that was a Lea Michele/Christina Aguilera one-two punch of suckiness against our nation's anthems. The Glee star did that annoying Broadway thing where she made her entire face seem over-exaggerated during "America the Beautiful." Sure, this is a big venue, but this is also for the TV audience, so doing that comes across as phony and insincere. Then again, at least she remembered the words, which is more than I can say for X-tina. The pop singer showed up with the most disgusting bleached hair extensions on the planet and felt the need to do runs on every single note of "The Star-Spangled Banner." Every note. It was far too much, though perhaps it was an attempt to compensate for the fact that she left out the "O'er the ramparts we watched" line, and changed "what so proudly we hailed" into "what so proudly we watched." I watched, I was not proud. This and Burlesque? Perhaps she needs to go into hiding for a while.
Some old faces will be returning to Seattle Grace... Sort of.
Before we get to the commercials, we have to give credit to Madonna for putting on a well-executed half-time show -- much to our surprise. She's got quite a bit of energy for her age (or, our age) and manages to lip-sync successfully. Bonus kudos to the tech guys who made the Vogue covers dance on the ground. And the performance was filled with an eclectic group of guests from Nicki Minaj (in a somewhat toned down cheerleader outfit), Cee Lo (dressed like a giant sparkly monk) and LMFAO (as their normal dirty selves). If only MIA hadn't been so... MIA, what with flipping the bird at a cameraman and all, it would have been a smoothly run eight minutes that was memorable for the right reasons. Wish we could say the same about all of the commercials.
These two guys are hosting the Oscars. In the words of fake Joy Behar, "So what? Who cares?"
It would have been 10, but the Super Bowl ads were generally unimpressive this year as a whole (blame the economy or something!), but there were some exceptions. The one thing that was a little different this year, at least to me, was the insane barrage of NBC promotion. Of course the network that has the Super Bowl is going to promote its own content and everything, but is it always that much self-promotion? It felt like every other ad was a Heroes, Chuck, MacGruber or that people-whose-asses-fell-off-watching-30 Rock thing. Anyway, the list below is the best of the non-movie trailer-y/NBC content as we saw it. (See Moviefile for the best trailers, and we're ignoring the NBC stuff completely.) Enjoy having to watch a commercial before watching a commercial! Yay capitalism!
I'm still not entirely sure why CBS decided to debut a show like this after the Super Bowl. I get that the game and its ratings provide a massive platform to launch a series, but after a day of drinking, eating way too many carbs and watching guys slug it out on the gridiron, the last thing I need is a "feel-good" reality show to lull me to sleep. This post-game berth should've gone to something funny or filled with action -- and CBS has that covered. A very special football themed Big Bang Theory? That would have been amazing. Heck, a CSI: Wherever that started with an explosion and one of the screaming Who songs that we were subjected to during the half-time show would have been a better match. Instead... there was this.