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The Telefile
Today's TWOP News: July 14, 2010

I'll be blunt: today's headlines feature more dreadful news (extra TV face time for Rachael Ray and Mario Lopez) than stuff to look forward to (Betty White on another NBC show). But you can be the judge of that (I'll judge you for liking Rachael Ray, though).

NBC's Community is hopping on the Betty White bandwagon (in a non-sexual way) by featuring her as a guest star on their second season premiere. She'll appear in the role of anthropology professor June Bauer. I wouldn't hate if a video of Betty White verbally abusing Chevy Chase was leaked from this. Would it be less funny since he's old, too?

The second season of Shaq vs. (the show that originally just featured Shaq challenging pro athletes in other sports to playful competition) will now have Shaq going head-to-head with "celebrities" in what they're known for. Examples include a singing contest with Justin Bieber, a cook-off with Rachael Ray and trying to stump Penn and Teller. Is this some sick marketing effort to give us competitively more reasons to not submit ourselves to this TV tragedy? It seems like no matter which way it goes, both sides come out as losers.

Speaking of losers, MTV has confirmed that Beavis and Butthead will return to their network, with an attempt to include music videos again, which the channel was initially known for. The grunting goons will now be targeting their snide remarks at current music videos, such as Lady Gaga's. My brain is exploding with how many things in her "Telephone" video they'll possibly mock. Payback for the 10 minutes of my life she took from me.

As if we don't see him enough on TV already, Mario Lopez will have his own reality show on VH1, following his preparation to enter fatherhood with pregnant girlfriend Courtney Mazza. But no matter how many shows he stars in, he will forever be known for this hilariously embarrassing A.C. Slater dance spasm.

NBC's America's Got Talent judge Piers Morgan may soon seal the deal to replace Larry King on his CNN show, as he has recently gotten the OK from NBC to begin talks with CNN. If it goes his way, Morgan has some big shoulder pads to fill after King's reign.

Supergirl, played by Laura Vandervoort, will return for the final season of Smallville. Still not persuading me to tune in to this no-longer-relevant series, but good for them, I guess.

Deirdre Lovejoy, who plays serial killer Heather Taffet on Bones, will be killed off from the Fox series. However, a new and even worse nemesis will replace the havoc she wreaked for the characters. But I think fans are more concerned with when the hell Booth and Brennan are gonna finally bone.

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